Here is your Survival Guide (well maybe not that dramatic… but you get the point) for your Wedding Day
Getting married is SO MUCH FUN…. like SO MUCH. It’s a gathering of all the people you love celebrating you and that one person that you’ve chosen to spend the rest of your life with (often filled with copious amounts of champagne) I mean what could be better?!
But of course, everyone is human and sometimes things go wrong, or don’t turn out exactly the way you envisioned. Knowing that, I wanted to put together some day of “wedding day advice” for those who are getting married in the future. I asked wedding vendors and previous clients what their BEST wedding day advice is and below is what I received (also I threw in a couple of them from me too ;))
Plan on 10 Things Going Wrong
This was advice I received from one of my girlfriends. She told me that her grandmother gave her this advice right before her own wedding. At first I thought… well that’s not very positive thinking, but after I let it sink in I understood what it meant. The bottom line is… not everything is going to be perfect, that’s impossible, so just go with the flow if it doesn’t and don’t let it ruin your day!
I had this mindset and honestly I didn’t even notice the things that went wrong until the next day (or a few months later when my sister told me haha) Here are a few in case you were hoping for some gossip:
My sister (and myself) forgot to take down my bustle before I walked down the aisle and it never got “unbustled” the entire wedding day. I specifically bought that dress for the gorgeous lace train and I have ZERO pictures of that. In the scope of the entire day, it was such a tiny thing that it really didn’t matter. What really mattered was marrying my husband and having our family and friends with us.
Like 3 people stood up when I walked down the aisle…. which also really doesn’t matter but it felt super weird, because every wedding I’ve ever been too everyone stands up when the Bride walks into the ceremony! haha
Our Officiant didn’t give instructions to the crowd after my husband and I walked back down the aisle so all the guests crowded the walkway and the bridal party couldn’t walk back down in an orderly fashion. Our poor photographer was yelling for the guests to move so she could get photos.
Our first dance: We took dancing lessons for EIGHT WEEKS in preparation. Then we got up to dance and my poor husband was stepping all over my dress, it was a disaster! Thank goodness our DJ could see the despair on our faces and wrapped up the music super fast. Shortest first dance ever, 30 seconds LOL!
We had one couple never RSVP and then just show up, and to top it off brought their child who was not included on their invitation… that’s pretty typical though for weddings!
The Menu sign I worked so hard to create got left in the storage room instead of being out on display.
There are more things but my point is, these things happened but I still say that our wedding was absolutely PERFECT and we had the BEST day ever!
Spend The Money and Invest in a Good Photographer
This isn’t really “Wedding Day” advice per se, but it’s so important because your photographer will literally be with you the ENTIRE wedding day. I cannot emphasis this enough, DO NOT SKIMP ON THE PHOTOGRAPHER. My best friend chose a photographer for the price and not for their work and she hates her wedding photos. You can’t redo your wedding photos, it’s one of the only things you take with you after the wedding day. I know everyone has a specific budget and sometimes a photographer that costs $4,500 doesn’t seem like it’s in the budget…I encourage you to do some serious digging for a good one that is in your budget, or find a way to cut back on another expensive. For me I cut back on my dress budget drastically so we could hire a photographer we loved. And honestly, I’m really glad I didn’t spend what I was going to spend on my dress when I first started looking haha.
If you are looking for more info on selecting a photographer I have a blog about that here!
Hire a Coordinator
This is A MUST. You or a family member, or a friend should not be the one making sure everything is on schedule and checking in with vendors on the day of the wedding, delegate that to someone else by hiring a coordinator. Day of coordinators are ok if you are in a pinch but really a coordinator that has been with you the entire process of wedding planning is going to be the best person to be there on the day of your wedding because they know basically everything about your wedding.
A lot of venues provide wedding coordinators for you. My husband and I got married at Leo Carrillo and we had someone assigned to us and she answered every question I had along the wedding planning way and they did an excellent job of coordinating the wedding on the wedding day. I still did all the planning myself but I knew on the day of the wedding I wouldn’t have to think about the schedule of events, someone would just tell me and my husband where to go and get us drinks (they were awesome! Shout out to Nikka and Leah!).
Delegate Everything to Your Wedding Party
Your Groomsmen and Bridesmaids are their to serve you (not in a demeaning way but as friends, don’t worry you’ll reciprocate one day ;)), and they want to help! Don’t do it all yourself and don’t make your family do it (think Mothers and Fathers), your family is there to enjoy the day too! I was awful at letting people help me and it made me so stressed out. I wanted to make a huge meal on my wedding day for the bridesmaids and moms and my husband shut that down so fast and delegated getting lunch to one of my Bridesmaids (I’m so glad he did). This is your time to ASK FOR HELP, let them help, they want to help and they want you to have an awesome day!
Also, if you need help after the wedding day ask them for that too. My husband and I had to leave our honeymoon suite at 10am to get a U-Haul and pack up all our wedding stuff from our venue and bring it back home the next day and it was not what we wanted to be doing the day after our wedding…. I’m so disappointed in myself that I didn’t ask for help, our day could have been a lot more relaxing. And just know that sometimes your wedding party doesn’t know what you need until you ask :)
Lastly, create a very detailed itinerary of the wedding weekend for your wedding party and anyone else involved. It will help everyone understand where they need to be when and what is expected of them.
Have a “Survival” Pack
Make a little bag with your lip stick, tissues, bobby pins, safety pins, tiny perfume and a snack bar (and any medication you may need) and kindly ask your photographer ahead of time if they can hold onto it for you in their bag. They’ll be with you all day! This advice comes directly from a photographer just in case you were wondering! However, not every photographer carries a bag, if your photographer doesn’t then get one of your Bridesmaids to carry it around or keep it close by.
You probably aren’t going to feel like it (I know I didn’t) but you are going to want to eat something because you’ve got a long, and most likely champagne filled, day ahead of you. Eat a good breakfast, a good lunch and try to sneak in a few bites at you wedding at least. You will be less hungover the next day ;) I remember drinking an almond milk vegan protein shake before walking out the door to the venue and it was great because I got all my vitamins minus the bloat … win win!
Focus On the Marriage and Not The Wedding Day
The wedding isn’t about anyone else but the couple and the love they share. Don’t get bogged down by other people’s drama or your linen vendor delivering the wrong colored table cloths. This day is about you and your other half, and the START of your life together. Try to sneak away for a split second if you can to just relish the moment.
Break in your Shoes
Do not wear a brand new pair of shoes to your wedding unless you want blisters as big as Mount Everest the next day. If you are worried about them getting dirty, just wear them around the house while you clean or do laundry haha!
Lastly, Soak in Every Moment
I can’t tell you how many brides get to the end of their wedding (myself included) and say “That’s it? It’s almost over? That went by so fast!” The day really does go by in a flash. Make a conscious effort to soak in every moment.
Your wedding is truly an incredible experience that you are going to remember for the rest of your life, don’t sweat the small stuff and be sure to focus on the love you have for your partner, because that is what is going to matter in your marriage!
Do you have some wedding day advice you’d like to share below? I’d love to hear it!